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Always fatigued and on edge? You could be in survival mode.

Merianne Drew

How to Move Out of Survival Mode and Start Thriving Again

If you’ve ever felt like you’re stuck in a constant state of reacting to life—putting out fires, juggling too much, and just trying to make it through the day—you’re not alone. This is survival mode, and while it’s a normal response to overwhelming stress, which happens from time to time, it’s not a place we’re meant to stay.

When we live in survival mode for too long, it takes a toll. Our minds feel scattered, our emotions feel fragile, and our bodies feel worn down. But you can get out of it. It starts with recognizing where you are and taking small, deliberate steps to climb your way back to a more balanced, thriving life.


1. Acknowledge You’re in Survival Mode

First, give yourself permission to name what you’re experiencing. Survival mode happens when life throws too much at us, and our minds and bodies shift into a state of hyper-focus on getting through the immediate moment.

If you’ve been irritable, exhausted, disconnected, or struggling to focus, it’s not a personal failure—it’s a sign your system is overwhelmed. There’s no shame in recognizing that you’re here; it’s the first step toward finding your way out.


2. Focus on the Foundation of Wellness First

When you’re in survival mode, self-care tends to fall by the wayside. The irony is that this is when you need it the most. Start with the basics:

  • Sleep: Are you getting enough? Even an extra 30 minutes can help.

  • Food: Are you nourishing yourself with real meals instead of skipping them or grabbing junk on the go?

  • Hydration: Sometimes fatigue and brain fog can be traced back to simple dehydration.

  • Movement: You don’t have to run a marathon, but stretching, walking, or dancing for even 10 minutes can work wonders.

It’s not about doing it perfectly; it’s about making small, consistent adjustments to care for yourself.


3. Pause Before Reacting

Survival mode creates a sense of urgency where everything feels like an emergency. Most of the time, it’s not. Take a moment to pause before responding to requests, making decisions, or rushing to fix something. Ask yourself:

  • Is this truly urgent?

  • Am I acting out of habit or from a place of intention?

That pause gives you a chance to reconnect with your inner calm and prioritize what really matters.


4. Give Yourself Permission to Ask for Help

We weren’t designed to handle life’s challenges alone. Lean on your support system. Don't have one? Find them. Reach out to a local church or non-profit. Get on meetup.com and find people who share the same life challenges as you that are willing to band together to lighten the load for everyone. People like to help, let them. Finding someone to talk to is great, whether it’s talking to a friend, leaning on your partner, or seeking guidance from a coach or therapist, asking for support is a sign of strength, not weakness. Letting someone in lightens your load, even if it’s just sharing how you feel. But talking isn't the only support you need. Find people who are willing to get their hands dirty and take on some of your burdens.


5. Assess Environment

Are the methods you use to check out and cope with the overwhelm contributing to the problem? Do you play high-stakes games on your phone to check out? When you're engaging in them, notice your body. Is it tense and rigid? Are you holding your breath? If so, these check-out methods aren't as helpful as they may seem when you're about to engage with them and anticipating relief. Find something that will actually take the edge off like a walk in nature, or standing alone and barefoot on the earth in the sun.


6. Break Goals into Manageable Steps

When you’re barely keeping your head above water, big goals can feel impossible. Focus instead on small, doable steps. Pick one thing you can accomplish today, and let that be enough.

Progress is progress, even if it feels slow. Celebrate the small wins because they’ll eventually lead to bigger changes. Try giving yourself a high five or pat on the back. I like to tell myself: "Good job!"


7. Let Go of Perfectionism

When we’re in survival mode, we often feel like we should be doing more or handling things better. That inner critic can be relentless. Give yourself permission to drop the idea that everything has to be perfect. Give yourself permission to be a human and humans have limits. Ask yourself, would it be reasonable to expect all of this from a person I care for? If not, then it's not reasonable to expect it of yourself. Right now, it’s okay to just focus on doing what’s manageable.


8. Reflect on What’s Keeping You Stuck

As you begin to regain a bit of footing, take some time to look at the bigger picture. Ask yourself:

  • What’s contributing to me feeling overwhelmed?

  • Am I overcommitting myself?

  • Are there things I can delegate, delay, or let go of? And can I find a way to accept the consequences of letting go of them?

Sometimes, breaking free from survival mode requires stepping back and reevaluating what’s truly important—and being willing to say no to the rest.


9. Visualize Life Beyond Survival Mode

Take a moment to picture what life could look like if you weren’t stuck in survival mode. What would your days feel like? How would your relationships look? How would you show up for yourself?

This isn’t just daydreaming. Visualization helps you reconnect with hope and clarity about what you’re working toward. We get what we look for, so look towards what you want.


10. Be Patient with the Process

Getting out of survival mode doesn’t happen overnight. It’s a gradual process of rebuilding, step by step. Be gentle with yourself along the way. You’re learning to shift from just surviving to truly living—and that takes time and intention.


Survival mode is a place we all visit at some point, but it’s not where we’re meant to live. You don’t have to do this perfectly, and you don’t have to do it alone. Start small, trust yourself, and take each day as it comes.

You deserve more than just getting by—you deserve to thrive.


With love and encouragement,

Merianne

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